Through tears and Smiles

What happens when,
What happens when to try to speak
But the words get stuck in your throat,

What do you do,
When though you have forgiven
Still you still mess things up.

How do you find
The right words to convey your feelings,
The right gestures that wholly convey your emotions;

I sit, I rise
I speak then fall silent
Because each emotion laden word redolent of the silent years
And the numerous tears
Is misunderstood and promptly tossed aside by you.

Speak you tell me,
Open your heart to me, you plead
Then I do and you don’t like what you see,
So in a bid to cope,
You make me eat my words

Well, I have henceforth decided
That come everything and anything
I will love you
Though you never know
how much you have hurt me
I will love you
Treat you right,
Through tears and smiles.

Our Love song.

pristine7:

God is the lyric to the perfect love song. Like music, you feel the song and connect with the lyrics. The same way, you connect with God and let His love and presence wrap you around and make you whole.

Originally posted on The Virtuous Spirit:

Typical Christian blogger like me, ran into a few love blogs that i’m totally loving at the moment. No doubt, I’m a love junkie. I like to love and be loved. I’m sure you do to so don’t even look at me like that. lol. :)
 
Meanwhile, last Sunday, i went for a LAFamily (we are Christians who study and apply God’s word virtually) meeting and after it all, i felt healing and warmth. That’s what happens when love is activated.
 
Okay, so in the love mood, let me just say a few things.
 
Love began with God and originated from God. He is the source of love. Love is a good thing so it’s okay to want to be loved.
Remember??

Remember??

God created our desire to be loved. He wants us to love and enjoy being loved.

Love is power and purity and health and peace…

View original 136 more words

Maladies and maladministrations

Humans are all inherently selfish. I don’t care who you are, the malady resides in us all. Jesus makes the difference in us. The capacity for selfishness is reduced. We however must realise that we can be. It’s one of our imperfections. It’s funny how can accept our imperfections mostly in a general sense. When we are honest, first with ourselves then with others, we will be able to acknowledge our need for help and maybe even get it. For the most part, we are masters of deception, advocates for our faults, and judges acquitting us of our crimes. Being honest is perhaps the best gift we can give ourselves, for in the acknowledgement of our humanity, we may have a chance to hold on to what’s being held out- divinity.

Much Ado about Something

Being sad in my book is much worse than being bitter. I know you may think that’s not true but that’s why I said ‘in my book. This is why:
* When you are bitter, you probably are bitter at one person or a couple of people at the most. When you are sad however, you don’t need a reason or a person.
* When you are bitter, you have a good chance of being pretty good company when the object of your bitterness isn’t around. When you are sad however, it can be contagious. Whoever came up with the saying, ‘Misery loves company’ is probably a sage.
* Bitterness can be uprooted when properly dealt with and the object of your bitterness is forgiven, in the case of sadness, the only known cure is a healthy dose of joy which you have to work up yourself. Imagine that, as with many things of worth and consequence, it has to be handled by you.
These are just a few reasons for my conclusion, not also leaving aside the fact that I have been down both roads and I can tell you which is which.

I speak about sadness and bitterness because it is the reason for the single word- brokenness. Not the brokenness that the bible enjoins us to be, but the brokenness that causes a lack of motivation, a sense of degradation and a conclusion of life being meaningless. The bible even says, a broken spirit, who can bear.

I believe that there is a young girl inside of every grown or growing woman. The quality of that girl however, is not only subject to the kinds of cards she has been dealt with in life but her approach and life decisions she makes as a result of these cards. I used to think that this thing about who you are was overstressed but now, I know better. As long as there are people in this world, there would always be a need for affirmation, love and feelings of self worth.
Our lives philosophies are shaped by what we see, read, meditate on, feel and most basically relate with. The issue is this- there are a lot of sad women today. This is bad because once they are sad, there is a signal sent to all their loved ones to try to fix them but the issue is they can’t be fixed by people and this is very frustrating for both parties. If they are not in a romantic relationship, it blinds them from anyone who could possibly love them and if they are in one, their partners continually fight the losing battle of trying to give them what only they can give themselves. They eventually give up and walk away or stay and shrivel up the relationship (this however is quite unlikely), however you look at it though, they give up.

What then do we do?
* We have to love ourselves: the first step to truly loving anyone is to love you. Tell yourself that you are beautiful even when you think you are lying.
* Forgive those who have hurt you: this is the only way you can move forward. Hand it over to God. He alone can help you with moving on.
* Allow yourself to dream: it doesn’t matter that it wasn’t what you originally thought you will do with your life, it doesn’t matter that it costs a lot of money that you don’t have, neither does it matter that people will laugh or some others will be disappointed. Take hold of your life and don’t let anyone live it for you. You were not made to live in anyone’s shadow.
* Enjoy your life. If you think you have to change jobs every year to service your many talents, do it. If you think you will be happy with many jobs, do it. When you need rest, take it. Love your friends, love your family, and forgive your parents and siblings. Yep. I said it. In life, they will inadvertently hurt you just as you have them, so forgive. It frees you to love your life.
* Be your foremost cheerleader: wear the outfits, carry the pompoms and cheer you into the life you see for yourself.
 

Much ado about something

Being sad in my book is much worse than being bitter. I know you may think that’s not true but that’s why I said ‘in my book. This is why;
* When you are bitter, you probably are bitter at one person or a couple of people at the most. When you are sad however, you don’t need a reason or a person.
* When you are bitter, you have a good chance of being pretty good company when the object of your bitterness isn’t around. When you are sad however, it can be contagious. Whoever came up with the saying, ‘Misery loves company’ is probably a sage.
* Bitterness can be uprooted when properly dealt with and the object of your bitterness is forgiven, in the case of sadness, the only known cure is a healthy dose of joy which you have to work up yourself. Imagine that, as with many things of worth and consequence, it has to be handled by you.
These are just a few reasons for my conclusion, not also leaving aside the fact that I have been down both roads and I can tell you which is which.

I speak about sadness and bitterness because it is the reason for the single word- brokenness. Not the brokenness that the bible enjoins us to be, but the brokenness that causes a lack of motivation, a sense of degradation and a conclusion of life being meaningless. The bible even says, a broken spirit, who can bear.

I believe that there is a young girl inside of every grown or growing woman. The quality of that girl however, is not only subject to the kinds of cards she has been dealt with in life but her approach and life decisions she makes as a result of these cards. I used to think that this thing about who you are was overstressed but now, I know better. As long as there are people in this world, there would always be a need for affirmation, love and feelings of self worth.
Our lives philosophies are shaped by what we see, read, meditate on, feel and most basically relate with. The issue is this- there are a lot of sad women today. This is bad because once they are sad, there is a signal sent to all their loved ones to try to fix them but the issue is they can’t be fixed by people and this is very frustrating for both parties. If they are not in a romantic relationship, it blinds them from anyone who could possibly love them and if they are in one, their partners continually fight the losing battle of trying to give them what only they can give themselves. They eventually give up and walk away or stay and shrivel up the relationship (this however is quite unlikely), however you look at it though, they give up.

What then do we do?
* We have to love ourselves: the first step to truly loving anyone is to love you. Tell yourself that you are beautiful even when you think you are lying.
Forgive those who have hurt you: this is the only way you can move forward. Hand it over to God. He alone can help you with moving on.
* Allow yourself to dream: it doesn’t matter that it wasn’t what you originally thought you will do with your life, it doesn’t matter that it costs a lot of money that you don’t have, neither does it matter that people will laugh or some others will be disappointed. Take hold of your life and don’t let anyone live it for you. You were not made to live in anyone’s shadow.
* Enjoy your life. If you think you have to change jobs every year to service your many talents, do it. If you think you will be happy with many jobs, do it. When you need rest, take it. Love your friends, love your family, and forgive your parents and siblings. Yep. I said it. In life, they will inadvertently hurt you just as you have them, so forgive. It frees you to love your life.
* Be your foremost cheerleader: wear the outfits, carry the pompoms and cheer you into the life you see for yourself.
 

Who am I

Who am I?
What am I here for?
It seems my life is just a series of events,
a cascade of the good, bad and ugly,
a myriad of tales with maybe just a smidge of happiness on the side.

Some tell me, live for now,
you don’t know tomorrow,
so seize today.
others say,
live for tomorrow,
the choices you make determine the course of your life.
How do I know which is right.

People travel the world on the claim of finding themselves,
all the while forgetting that who they are looking for is right with them all the while,
there has to be something more to life than ourselves,
something beyond just another day,
another experience,
another tally to the barrage of life’s lessons.

Various theories have been given to this thing called life,
some sounding as useful as Mendels law of inheritance,
others as discardable as Larmacks theory of use and disuse.

I have not all the answers I seek,
I however have come to realise,
my greatest joys have been derived from living my life for the One above,
while this doesn’t take away all my problems,
it sure gives me a fortitude to face them.

The manufacturer is more important than the product,
If the product is destroyed,
the manufacturer can create another,
the potter is more important than the clay,
the artist more than the work,
the scientist than the experiment,
God more than man.

He alone that created us can tell us who we are and what we are made for,
I’d spend my life trying to out from Him what He had in mind when he made me,
though I may not always stay or get it right,
I like my life much better with God in it.

Love and Doubt

If you loved ‘virginity is a verb’, you will love this piece. It is by the same author- Readywryter. Enjoy!

Nothing intrigues you about lovers than the ready way they occupy each other’s private space to present a perfect, doting front even when as individual, you could see their sharp, misunderstood angles sticking out. It’s like being with someone who fades your flaws, who completes your stuttering so the world can finally understand what you were saying all along. It’s like you befriending relief.
It is not every time you see this of course in a transactional city like Lagos where even the best of relationships are mostly transactional, where lovers see their exes as the bullet they dodged as supposed to the one that got away. But there are exceptions to every rule and it is this exception, this angle that intrigues you, that wakes you at night to dream, that makes you not want to settle for less even when less appears to be the overriding mores.
Today, you write for your friends who redefined precedence to present a template, who find something worth chasing in those the world would rather chastise. You do recognize that the time a man wakes up is his morning so you do not judge those whose love breathes at the sight of mint, mating or macho but this is for those who search beyond the tinsel, trailers and all the trappings without to love anyway. And here is a ready clue; their last name isn’t Christ.
You remember that lady in church who proposed to your shy, dithering friend who, in his defense, has created many occasions for proposal but just couldn’t come through even though the ring remains in his pocket. As if that wasn’t enough ‘taboo’, she is older than him and that was enough red-light for his other friends to raise the desperation card against her. But not you and thank goodness not your friend either as he is able to sweep away fluffs and face the brass tacks because today he is a successful life coach…. certainly not the job for the lily livered.
You remember your brilliant course-mate, very well put together human being. He was apparently the dream of most ladies in your church because of the uproar that received the news of his engagement to a former “runs girl”- a proper streetwise nymphet. Now, the problem with the past is that of its long shadow, a shadow more dedicated than the foulest of farts. You remember religious, half-wit brothers welding around him like a coven, whingeing that he deserved better, that they have propositioned her, some even went as far as showing you pictures on their Iphones to back up their claims of  having had a share of the… ahem… local cake. Talk about the I-sin on a cake. But he stuck to his gun and today, Hollywood’s best offer of a happy family doesn’t do theirs justice with three lovely kids.
Their stories inspire you to believe, to keep an eye out for love, still. To look out for renegade, those who conformed less, whose love is spelt in commitment. You doubt your prospects when you see relationships crumble around you like Arsenal’s title bid but you balled up again when you read that Doubt and faith go hand in hand. Faith and certainty are like oil and water. And when love does finally appear, you hope to resist that doubt that whispers nothing this good could wait this long for me to stumble upon.

Little Feet

She is only seven years old
But her brown eyes tell a tale,
A tale of misery, a tale of pain,
Suffering, hardship, much more than you could imagine.

She was beaten, bruised,
Neglected, scorned and mistreated.
Her life is like an encyclopedia of various negative pills,
Filled with chronologies of bruised arms and scarred faces.

She is a woman now,
She has learnt from the litany of pain,
She has gleaned experience,
The kind that needs never have been learned.

Bishop T.D Jakes said bent saplings makes twisted trees,
She alone can tell you the truth that lies behind those words.
If you look closely, behind the tough shell,
Behind the over compensation with whatever she uses,
You might also see it.

We miss her, the lady she would have been had her life not been shattered at a very young age,
It’s shards piercing through her skin,
Drawing blood, emptying her of her innards.

Protect the patter of little feet,
Sing to her the song of freedom,
Sing to her of the Lord’s redeeming power,
Let her be born and let her find healing in His wings.

Dedicated to you

How do you fight with someone who won’t get into the ring with you?
Where do broken hearts go when they have been shattered beyond recognition?
What do you do when your heart squeezes tight in your chest, so tight you fear you can’t take another breath, though through no apparent fault of yours?

We all at one time or the other experience one or more of these feelings. I am not here to condemn you. If however, you are one of those people who we see through our opaque glass mirror of life, you who everyone seems to think you exist for some reason- you who never feel pain, never know sadness and never rethink who you are and what you do at any point in your life, good luck.
I speak though to those who at one time know pain, sadness and doubt, who may have one time or the other contemplated ending your sojourn here on this ephemeral side of eternity, you who may have forgotten what it means to believe in yourself or maybe you never knew what that ever meant. You who have never been celebrated, recognised or accepted.
This is my message to you:
1. Go out today expecting something good to happen- when you are down, the only way to go is up. Expect to go there. If you don’t have good today, look forward to tomorrow.  It will get better. There is hope.
2. Find something to be grateful for- if nothing else, realise that the fact that you are alive is proof positive that it can and will get better. Don’t end your life. What if it isn’t better over there? You can’t just wish to come back here.
3. Embrace and believe that there is love and life in the world- In the midst of darkness is where light is most appreciated. Don’t just stop at embracing and believing, act it out. Shake, hug, smile, laugh. These little things go a long way.
4. Don’t ever get bitter- there is enough evil in the world as it is, thank you very much
5. Love, love and don’t stop loving- someone loved you and died to prove it, you share love with others too… give as you can and don’t forget to laugh with and at yourself.

Musings

Whose soever sins ye remit, they are remitted unto them; and whose soever sins ye retain, they are retained.’ John 20:23.

It strikes me how we Christians who are to be the most sincere, considerate and helpful people have the tendency to also be the most judgmental people… we are called to be like Jesus and I hope you enjoy this musing of mine and it blesses you, reminding you of what God has called us to be.

Don’t judge me,
You don’t know who I am,
Don’t judge me,
You don’t know where am from.

You caught me in the act,
You claim I deserve to die,
You can’t see,
You don’t know.

I realise that I shouldn’t be doing this,
I know it is wrong,
If there isn’t a propensity to fall
Then it wouldn’t be a temptation.

Sweet, kind, considerate words
Gentle, tender, loving hands
Things I long for and never have
don’t you even think you are better than me

Abused, dejected, rejected, misused,
You never got to face these lyk I
Yet you choose to point fingers
When am a captive to my passions.

Jesus came, bringing all I need with Him,
He loved me, no matter my wretched past
He took me in, no judgement in His kind eyes

Now, the Lord is my caretaker,
I have all I need,
As for you that have known Him for a while and think I don’t deserve Him,
Looking at me in terms of my past and not my present
Remember that Christ came to save sinners of whom I am chief.

This is what I will do:
I will take His love to a dying world,
I will proclaim that no matter what you have done or who you are,
He loves you and He died just to show it,
I will walk day by day
Living like my husband, lover, friend and everything
Who thought me everything I know about love and acceptance,
I will spread His message of love and grace.

Don’t Be Discouraged

Recently, I came across a poem that spoke deeply to me and lifted me up. This I believe should be the aim of whatsoever we have to do that involves others.

We live in a world where people think they have a right to judge you and your actions; right or wrong.  This you see, can become very frustrating and can make the ‘accused’ feel less than they actually are. Everyone at a point are victims of this, I believe. We live in a weight obsessive, relationship rushing, money grasping,  power tussle, appearance conscious society.  I know you feel me. This can lead to chasing what isn’t lost and holding on to what can’t be found. This ultimately could lead to low self esteem, wrong evaluation of what’s important and striving for the wrong things,  jumping on the train of the next fad and latest things in fashion. This is tiring, I must say. You will probably agree with me.

Before I unveil what i have for you today,  lemme say that I hope you break away from that vicious circle and focus on what’s important.

What I have is the writeup that encouraged me. It is called “I refuse to be discouraged” by a person called BJ George. Enjoy!

I refuse to be discouraged,
To be sad or cry;
I refuse to be downhearted,
And here’s the reason why…

I have a God who’s mighty,
Who’s sovereign and supreme;
I have a God who loves me,
And I am on His team.

He is all wise and all powerful,
Jesus is His name;
Though everything is changeable,
My God remains the same,

My God knows all that’s happening;
Beginning to the end,
His presence is my comfort,
He is my dearest friend.

When sickness comes to weaken me,
To bring my head down low,
I call upon my mighty God;
Into His arms I go.

When circumstances come to rob me of my peace;
He draws me close unto His breast,
Where all my strivings cease.

And when my heart melts within me,
And weakness takes comtrol;
He gathers me into His arms,
He soothes my heart and soul.

The great “I AM” is within me,
My life is in His hand,
The “Son of God” is my hope,
It’s in His strength I stand.

I refuse to be defeated,
My eyes are on God
He has promised to be with me,
As through this life I trod.

I’m looking past all my circumstances,
To Heaven’s throne above;
My prayers have reached the heart of God,
I’m resting in His love.

I give God thanks in everything,
My eyes are on His face,
The battle’s His, the victory mine;
He’ll help me win the race.